Maybe It’s Time to Let Your Dreams Die
Photo by Allef Vinicius on Unsplash
I have a dream. Two actually. They’ve been planted deep in my heart since I was young. I’ve held them for years, and over time they have become more vivid, with more clarity. Yesterday — I let them die.
I can imagine the look of shock and horror potentially growing on your face but dear reader, please allow me a short time to elaborate.
Now, I am not saying to not have hope! Nor am I saying to not practice the virtue of magnanimity. These are very good things, and our hearts are made to operate with these. But many of us have grown up with the familiar theme of the standard Disney movies (and such) to “believe in your dreams” and to “have faith in your dreams!” It drives us to find our happiness and meaning in this hidden desire of our heart. But this is what I want to probe at: should this be the primary drive of our heart?
Caution in How You Dream
There are dangers that can come from operating in this way. Firstly, if our drive is primarily geared towards something we do not have, we miss out on the present. The irony of this is that our dreams are often geared toward a longing for living, when the opportunity to live is only in the here and now.
God has given you every grace to live to the fullest as yourself, because He made you and loves you and has a beautiful design for your life — but God’s grace is only available in the present moment. If I cannot be thankful and rejoice in God for what is in front of me now, whatever it may look like, will I truly be capable of thanking Him when the time comes when He fulfils a longstanding desire of my heart?
Who Sits on the Throne?
There is also a second danger with this: becoming too inwardly focused. That is not to say that we should lack self-knowledge, not at all! In fact, St. Catherine of Siena says that this is the first step on our journey to God, because it reveals our immense need for Him.
But imagine on the top of your heart there is a throne. Only one can reign over your heart and by it order how everything operates. If we honestly look at our hearts, who have we placed there? If I place all my wants, dreams, and desires at the centre of my purpose, then there’s only one who could be on that throne seat … it begs the question, who have I allowed to rule over my heart and my life? Jesus, or me?
Are Good Desires Becoming a Burden?
Dear reader, let me say here that your dreams are not bad things. In fact, I can imagine some of them you may have.
Maybe it’s one of these:
I dream of meeting a good man and having a life and family together.
I dream of using my talents and abilities to bring about a greater good.
I dream of bettering myself by achieving some goal that I have set.
All these are good aspirations, but as human beings, we are complex, and even good desires can carry underlying motives that steal our peace. Maybe we’ve made an agreement that our inherent value is only accomplished by the achievement of these dreams, for example. As good as any desire may be, they are not meant to be the foundation of our identity.
And maybe dear reader, you’re tired, and upset that things haven’t worked out as you would’ve liked yet. And maybe, just maybe, you feel life being sucked from your soul, and a sorrow scratching on your heart and perplexing your mind.
Then maybe, if this is you, it’s time to know the truth …
Maybe it’s time to let your dreams die, so that hope may arise!
Because the Good News is this, dear reader. You were made with a purpose! Eternity is written on your heart. There is something that only you can reveal about the truth of Our Father that no one else can.
God has good plans for you, for your prosperity and to give you a future and a hope! (Jeremiah 29:11). His Will is to fulfil the plans and purposes He Himself has made for you because His mercy lasts forever (Psalm 138:8). Jesus Himself is the way for which we become truly ourselves, because He Himself is the way, the truth and the life (John 14:6). By living in Him and giving our whole hearts and all that contains to Him, He Himself gives us His whole self and whole life. His promise for us, by Himself, is an abundance of life (John 10:10).
The Pattern: Death Before Life
But as we enter the Paschal mystery, we must confront this inevitability — that for us to live, we must first die. Just open Paul’s letters; it’s scattered across his epistles.
When the Greeks were yearning and asking to see Jesus just after He entered Jerusalem to fulfil the Father’s Will by the Passion, Jesus replied to their request with this: “The hour has come for the Son of man to be glorified. Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit” (John 12:24).
Why did Jesus say this as a response when others wanted to see Him?
Because the truth is, to see Him, we must let all else die. We need to first die in Him so to live in Him.
We must give everything to Him so that we can follow Him. There is a pain that comes with letting things die, but it cannot compare to the promise in store if we let it. For this to happen, it is essential to place our hope in the right place.
We must place our hope in Jesus Himself.
St. Martha: A Model for Hope Arising from Death
I think of St. Martha as an example of this. Imagine this; she and her siblings (Lazarus and Mary) were close friends with Jesus, so close He used to regularly visit her home as a refuge throughout His public ministry. She knows He loves them.
But Lazarus, her only provider and support, fell sick. Death was quickly pressing over him. So confident she was in Jesus that she knew it wouldn’t take many words for Him to come. So she writes to Him, “Lord, he whom you love is ill.” (John 11:3). There is often great simplicity with great intimacy.
She waits, holding on … and He didn’t come.
Her brother, unable to hold on anymore, gives up his breath. Jesus didn’t come. Martha’s dream of her brother recovering - died.
But her hope didn’t.
When Jesus arrived, four days after this tragedy, Martha walked up to Jesus. In the face of sorrow, distress, anguish, confusion, when the one she turned to didn’t come as she dreamed, she turns to Him and says this:
“Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. And even now I know that whatever you ask from God, God will give you.” (John 11:21–22)
What an incredible answer! Martha placed her hope in Jesus, not in her dream. She trusted in Him enough to let her request die, and allowed Jesus Himself to respond in His time. Jesus did not miss her first request. He answered, but His answer was to delay, because by death coming first, a greater good would come not only to Martha, but to many.
Death came to visit Martha, but Jesus came in return to bring something far greater than anyone could fathom. In response to death, Jesus brought Resurrection! (see John chapter 11 for full story)
The Invitation
So too with us, dear reader. As we look to the Cross of Our Lord, maybe He’s asking us to lay down what we hold at the centre of our hearts, so that His purposes can be fulfilled.
Our deepest desires — when surrendered to Him — are not lost, but purified and brought into His will. In the death of our own dreams and wishes in Him, He births in us the joy that can only come from knowing His Will and letting it be done.
So yes, I let my dreams die in Him, for I know He has purposes He wants to fulfil in me. His dreams for me are far greater than anything I could dare to imagine for myself. So who am I to let my own dreaming get in the way of Him showing me this?
So maybe it is time to let your dreams die, but to let them die in Christ. Lay them down with Him and let hope arise. For we know with Our Mighty, Awesome God, death is never the ending, but the beginning of something new.
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” (Romans 15:13)